From the daily archives:

Friday, September 17, 2010

Things have been really hopping lately here at the ABC Family Household.  Yesterday was a prime example.

Thanks to a great neighbor (my neighbors are so awesome that you’d think I were Pollyanna or something, but remember, I’m Ms. Skeptic/Sarcasm first and foremost, and everything I ever say about my neighbors really is TRUE), I got a largely kid-free day yesterday.

Just in case you were wondering, kid-free is FABULOUS!!!!!!!!!!  Not that I don’t love my kids and all, and I really enjoy and treasure being a Mom (cough – gag – snort)… but when I am without them for a little while, it’s as if a whole other area of my brain is activated, and I feel almost kind of whole again.

After getting everyone on the bus/to their appropriate destination (did I mention how much I LOVE my neighbors????), I headed over to Panera in a nearby suburb to meet with Wisconsin Mommy.  I was supposed to be there at 9:30, but I called her at 9:20 when it was obvious – even to me, who lives in denial about timeliness most of the time—that I was running behind schedule.  So, after letting WI Mommy know that I’d be about 10 – 15 minutes late, I headed out to meet her.

WI Mommy is smart, and fun, and wayyyy ahead of me about this whole blogging thing.  I always look forward to any opportunity I get to meet with her.  In fact, I was learning so much from WI Mommy, and we got so busy brainstorming and hatching plans and sharing ideas, that all of a sudden I looked at my watch and it was 2:15!!  Talk about having so much fun that you lose track of time!

Ever so rudely, I abruptly used a mild expletive or two and raced out of the coffee shop.  You see, I had a 2:45 appointment, and it was going to take me about 40 minutes to get there.  (Note to self:  Remember to include an apology note to WI Mommy when I email her the info I promised!)

I arrived at my 2:45 appointment at 2:53.  Thankfully, the doctor I was seeing is kind and understanding and doesn’t seem to believe in punitive action.  In fact, he noticed I was nearly hyperventilating (rushing does that to me – oh, as does the few extra pounds I’m carrying…) and told me to take a minute to “find my center” and relax.

Well, that appointment ended on time (what a concept!) at 3:45, but there was no doubt that I wasn’t going to be on time for the next one.  So, en route to home, I quickly placed a call to our wonderful dentist and told her I was running a tad late for our 4:00 appointment.  Arrived home at 3:56, ran to the neighbor’s house, picked up Amy, thanked the neighbor (note to self:  email neighbor with days I’m available next week to reciprocate the babysitting) and ran back to our driveway to wait for the school bus.  Which showed up approximately 50 seconds later, at 4:03.

Strangely enough, the kids thought they could head into the house, use the bathroom, grab a snack, and tell me about their day.  They were none too happy when I bribed them directly into the van with the promise of fruit snacks and postulated that since Dr. O has chairs that massage your back while your mouth is worked on, that she likely had a bathroom at her office, too.

By this time, I’m thinking ahead to my next commitment, which clearly I’m going to be running late for.  So I call my sitter, a lovely high school girl who I would adopt in a heartbeat if she didn’t already have such a wonderful family, and left her a message NOT to come to my house at 5:00, but that I would pick her up at her house when we were done with the dentist.  In my voice message to her, I estimated that time to be about 5:10.

Fast-forward through the dentist appointments (Claire and I had cleanings and check ups).  [Though I am leaving out the fun of trying to keep an eye on Kate and Amy squabbling over a toy hammer while the hygienist is gently trying to remind me of the benefits of flossing, and tactfully asking, “Is it possible that you’re not flossing enough?”.]  We race out of the dentist’s office at 5:23, during which time I check my text messages and see that the wonderful Miss K. (the babysitter) has let me know she received my message and that she’ll see me when I arrive at her door.

Well, I’m quite a bit later than I told Miss K. in my message, so I quickly call her cell and tell her I’m about 1 minute away.  As per her usual responsive and responsible self, she’s outside waiting for me.

One minute later, I pull into my own driveway and shoo everyone out of the van, hurriedly describing to Miss K. that the oven was hot (thank GOD for Time Bake) and there was pizza in the freezer for supper.  Affable and efficient as ever, Miss K. gets the kids in the house, and I peel rubber out of the subdivision and head to Claire’s school.

I was supposed to be in Claire’s classroom at 5:30 for the first part of a two-part parent/teacher meeting that reviewed the fourth grade curriculum and welcomed us parents to the year, blah blah blah.  Needless to say, I was late, jogging in the main door at about 5:37.  I raced up the stairs to the second floor, wondering once again exactly how bad a first impression I’d be making, skulking in late.

I find the classroom, sneak into my daughter’s desk, and see that she’s written me a note.  ‘Awwww, how sweet,’ I’m thinking as I read.  And it IS sweet… until I get to the end, where there’s something that makes me cringe and hang my head in embarrassment: